• A 13-year-old boy who wanted to smoke cigarettes and needed to be patted down before he left stores when he first came here, but emerged as a smart and gentle boy as his guard came down.
• His 9-year-old brother with stick-out ears, an infectious smile, and a sweet soul.
• A 12-year-old boy who is responsible beyond his years but playful and funny at the same time.
• A 13-year-old girl with so much potential -- the caretaker of the group, she looked out for all of the kids. She had a rough adjustment while she was here but glimmers of the beautiful soul within shone through.
• Her 10-year-old brother, quick to laugh and so easy to please. He's funny and sensitive and wants so badly to be loved.
• A 10-year-old boy with a soft smile who is the world champion at pouting. He didn't want or ask for much... Time spent together was his priority.
• A 10-year-old boy with a tough exterior who is smart and quick to learn. He softened considerably while he was here and his gentleness was plain to see.
• A 9-year-old girl with delicate features and a sweet, sweet heart. She's a girly-girl, but was all for playing chase and "monsters" with her host dad and brother.
• A 9-year-old girl who loves to organize everything and call all the shots, but is really a softie underneath it all.
• Her 7-year-old brother -- my boy's best friend -- sweet, kind, and our all-American Russian.
• Their 5-year-old ball-of-energy brother with the heart of a daredevil.
• A 7-year-old girl entraced with purses, perfume, make-up, and anything that sparkled. She's all girl, but she's tough as nails, too.
• And Peanut, perpetual motion with no concept of fear, he has a gentle side that not many people saw. He's stubborn, sweet, funny, athletic, intelligent, and artistic.

My fellow host families and I loved all of the kids, not just our own. One of the other host parents calls Peanut his nephew. I think that's how we all feel. On December 6th we learned that over half of our kids (including Peanut) had been placed with patr*nat families. The kids who remained would soon follow, and just a few weeks later we were told that they were all gone. Our collective hearts were broken.

Yesterday we received shocking news. The three oldest girls managed to send a letter to the escort who came with them this summer. They are still at the orphanage... we thought they were long gone. One girls asked the escort why she doesn't visit and why we don't call anymore. It was so sad and sweet; it made me miss her so much. We've since learned that 8 of our kids are still there for sure... we're still trying to find out about the rest.

I'm not sure about Peanut yet, but I'm alternately thrilled and sickened that some of the kids are still there. Thrilled because this uncomplicates the adoption process a bit. Sickened because we've been lied to and for months these kids have been waiting for contact from us.

I'm not sure why this happened. To the best of our knowledge the orphanage director is trying to prevent the kids from being adopted internationally. But, frankly, I just don't know what to think.